How’s your Monday going? Would a high-voltage insult come in handy? Help you get through the day? Well, we at the Bard and Bible blog are here to serve.
Today’s insult is another from Shakespeare’s King Lear–and from the rapier tongue of the Earl of Kent, a master of the craft. Here is a very Vesuvius of insults he speaks to Oswald, Goneril’s steward, in Act 2, Scene 2:
A knave; a rascal; an eater of broken meats; a base, proud,
shallow, beggarly, three-suited, hundred-pound, filthy,
worsted-stocking knave; a lily-liver’d, action-taking, whoreson,
glass-gazing, superserviceable, finical rogue; 1090
one-trunk-inheriting slave; one that wouldst be a bawd in way of
good service, and art nothing but the composition of a knave,
beggar, coward, pander, and the son and heir of a mongrel bitch;
one whom I will beat into clamorous whining, if thou deny the
least syllable of thy addition (King Lear, II.2.14).
And that, my friends, is how you do it.